Today is the last day in our latest hometown. Tomorrow we get on the ferry one last time (oh, how I won’t miss the ferry!) to cross the ocean (oh, but how I will miss the ocean!) and ultimately the mountains to our new home town of Calgary, Alberta.
I’m finding that it’s not hard leaving but it is hard to tell people why.
We’re just done here; it’s time for us to leave.
How do we tell people that the place that they have grown up in, are raising their families in, have chosen to come to, isn’t right for us anymore?
There is nothing wrong with here; other than it’s too easy to stay…and we don’t want easy.
They look at me with blank, uncomprehending stares; tell us how good we have it here; and wonder how we could possibly want to leave.
I get that they don’t get it; sometimes I don’t either but I have to leave. If I don’t I never will. And I need to.
There is something in me that compels me to keep going. I don’t know why. I don’t feel like I’m searching for anything; I just like different…but I also like not-different and if I don’t push myself toward different I will just stay. And I don’t want to stay.
Is it the same thing that compelled my parents to come here? Or before that maybe. I’ve always been fascinated by the first settlers in Canada and the US. What on earth compelled those people to leave their lives in Europe to come here and set up camp in the middle of nowhere? And why, pray tell, did anyone stop in Manitoba or Saskatoon or Wyoming or Montana where the winters are brutal and the mosquitoes make summer unbearable?
I know it doesn’t make much sense and I don’t try to make sense of it. I want the same things everyone wants; happiness, a sense of peace, and a feeling of having done what we want to do.
For some, that is raising a family in the same hometown they were raised in; giving their kids a sense of security and belonging. For others it’s watching the seasons, and the landscape, change slowly over time; a chance to really know a place and all it’s nooks and crannies. For me, it’s that feeling that I’m always pushing myself; not too far, just into uncomfortable. The sense that I’m trying. That I’ll look back and say ‘yeah, that was worth it’.
We’re looking forward to new challenges and the excitement that exploring a new place will bring. We will miss friends and family; bootcamp buddies and riding mates; but it’s they who have put us up to this…always supporting us and seeing our potential. And for that we are grateful. It’s been fun; thank you.
And so we say goodbye to Victoria, and hello to the next GiantStep in this great adventure.
To help transition across the ocean and over the mountains into a new home and job, I have asked some friends to help me with posting in the next couple of weeks. It’s a great chance to hear some new voices here as they share their stories. Please welcome them warmly and visit their home sites too. Cheers!