Know what this is?
It’s undone stuff. Unhung pictures. Still packed boxes.
We’ve been here in Calgary over a year now and just haven’t bothered to completely unpack or settle in.
I realized this last week when friends moved into a new house and then declared just a few short days later that everything was unpacked; the dishes were all put away, the pictures hung on the wall, and the boxes all recycled.
‘Wow‘, I said, ‘we still have pictures that are not hung and boxes that are still packed.‘
‘It’s because you’re not all here’, Peter said to me. ‘You have one foot here and one foot somewhere else.’
And I suddenly realized just how right he is.
I’m ready to go, but it’s not time yet. We have a summer full of plans (including our trip to Japan!) – so full that it’s impossible, at this point, to find time to plan for anything beyond summer.
I’ve been struggling lately. I find it difficult to concentrate on my job, mostly because I just don’t care. I see opportunities float by just out of reach because there is no way I can even plant a seed with no time to water it, and nurture it, and see what it can become. I imagine what it will be like when I’m out there, doing something different…and then I wonder if I’m just crazy. I don’t even know where out there is never mind what something different is going to look like.
And yet I feel compelled. Compelled to keep reaching. Compelled to try something different. Compelled to keep taking Giant Steps. Even if I feel uncomfortable. Even if I don’t know why. Even if I don’t know where it’s going to end up.
I am, as you read this, in the Grand Teton Mountains of Wyoming. I am sure that the fine mountain air, the conversation with old friends, and the exhausting hiking will bring me some clarity.
Tomorrow I fly to Portland for this years World Domination Summit which, I hope, will propel me forward with passion, hope, and confidence.
Our plan is to return and start finding some seeds to plant.